If you find yourself stepping back amazed at your child’s ability to whip from one emotion to the next, believe me you are not alone. The emotions of preschoolers are especially large and varied.

In some ways these little people seem quite capable. They can dress themselves, feed themselves, use the bathroom and carry on a conversation.

It is often tempting to think of them as older than they actually are developmentally. Although they have come leaps and bounds since the days of being a tiny, wailing newborn, they are still quite small.

If we are being honest, they still put their clothes on backwards, get food all over their face, miss the toilet with startling frequency, and get misunderstood when they talk.

In the same ways that their other skills are a work in progress, so too are their abilities to regulate emotions.

Aside from finding ways to maintain the incredible amount of patience, how else can we help?

As Kathy Hurley wrote in The Happy Kid Handbook “building a ‘feelings vocabulary’ means giving your child language to express their feelings and teaching them the visual cues and internal feelings . . . that accompany each feeling” (p71).

Instead of thinking of huge emotions as behavior problems, think of them as you would learning to put shoes on the wrong feet.

Your child needs reminders, coaching, tools to figure it out.

What Can You Do?

A lot of this coaching happens in the moment.

• Model calm behavior as the adult.
• Help the child take a break or calm down.
• Problem solving ways to fix their problem or address their frustrations.

This is an exhausting process, but it can be supported.

Instead of always waiting for your preschooler to have a complete meltdown before addressing their feelings, talk about their emotions when they are happy and calm.

When my twins were preschoolers (and even now that they’re older) I planned activities to specifically talk about feelings.

Not every day, sometimes not even every week, but at least a couple times a month I plan a book and/or activity that addresses their emotions. I plan time to play and read and talk to them about their big emotions.

You can use these as I have, for periodic discussions about all those big emotions, or you can lump them together for a fun unit on feelings.

Below are some of our favorite ways to talk about emotions with preschoolers.

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Preschool Feelings Unit Ideas

Knowing the vocabulary for basic emotions and the facial indicators that go along with them are the first step. We practice this in playful ways.

Sing Songs

One of our favorites is the song “If You’re Happy and You Know it”. (If you are unfamiliar with the basic song, you can find it on YouTube here)

We don’t just sing about happiness though. We cover all of the emotions. For example, some of our favorite verses are;

“If you’re surprised and you know you can gasp!….”

“If you’re angry and you know it you can stomp your foot…”

“If you’re sad and you know it you can cry….”

It’s so simple, but this song is great because it has emotions vocabulary, encourages you to pair the facial expression, and gives your preschooler a healthy way to express each emotion.

As a bonus, it can go on for quite some time or be rather short, which is perfect when you are driving in the car or waiting somewhere with your child.

Read Books about Emotions

Elephant and Piggie series or Pigeon books
by Mo Willems
(Find it Online) or (Find it Online)

Wemberly Worried
by Kevin Henkes
(Find it Online)

When Sophie Gets Angry
by Molly Bang
(Find it Online)

Mouse Was Mad
by Linda Urban
(Find it Online)

My Many Colored Days
by Dr Seuss
(Find it Online)

Feelings
by Aliki
(Find it Online)

Llama Llama books
by Anna Dewdney
(Find it Online)

Walter Was Worried
by Laura Vaccaro Seeger
(Find it Online)

Exploring Emotions with Art

During our unit, we did various art activities to support learning about emotions.

We also did a similar prompt on paper, on the chalkboard (pictured), on the light table, and on the easel outside with paint.

We often did this in the morning and talked about how we were feeling over breakfast.

After reading Llama Llama Red Pajama, we made these heart loveys. This was a great time to discuss the emotions we feel at bedtime, which have been particularly large lately.

We also did this story time emotions lesson that you could do with any of the books listed above with materials you have at home or in your classroom already.

Find more of our Preschool Units here!

“The Superkids Activity Guide helps children understand what their bodies are telling them and provides them with the right words so they can tell their parents exactly what they are feeling and why they are feeling it.” 

(superkidsguide.com)

Looking for another great resource? Join the SuperKids movement!

Are emotions getting in the way of successful mornings? Are they leading to meltdowns at bedtime?

Then this is the book for you. 

Dayna’s impressive understanding of how to focus on the positive and help all children succeed is remarkable and inspiring.

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